1) Stop using the mirror
Go a month without using a mirror, and notice how it makes you feel. (If you're paranoid, Ask a housemate or a co worker that you trust to be on duty to tell you if you've got green stuff in your teeth.) There's a great article about this here at whole living magazine.
2) Stop counting calories and weighing yourself
Instead focus on exercise, eating healthy, and taking good care of yourself. Pay particular attention to how good those things make you feel.
3) Wear clothes that make you feel good
They need not be expensive. (I get most of mine at thrift stores and at clothing swaps.) Ladies, I'd like to recommend this fantastic blog, Already Pretty, which focuses on dressing for your body type and feeling good in your own skin.
4) Have more sex
Enjoying your sexuality is a GREAT way to feel good in your body. I recommend listening to the Savage Love Podcast for tips on how to enjoy your sexuality. Get playful with your partner or get a new toy for yourself. You'll feel better, really.
5) Go outside
If you live in a city, go to the park. If you live in the country, go for a walk in the woods. Being a part of the world will help you get out of your head.
6) Cancel your magazine subscriptions
Celebrity Magazines, fashion magazines, fitness magazines, and even yoga magazines are usually photoshopped to make the models look skinnier. Even if you enjoy the articles, the images can worm themselves into your mind, making you think that you need to look like that. I recommend finding bloggers you like instead. I love this post at fit and feminist, where the author recommends that we stop paying attention to celebrity culture because it only encourages us to objectify our own bodies.
7) Spend time with the people you love
People who feel connected to their community lead happier, longer lives. If you're feeling crappy about yourself, call someone who you really like and make a date with them.
Have you had success in reducing your judgement of your own body? I'd love to hear about it! Please share either here or by email.
I've long abided by what I'm going to refer to as my Too Bad approach. When I'm perceiving that I don't look how society/culture prefers me to appear, I say to myself: Too Bad for those other people who have to "suffer" seeing what they don't want to!
ReplyDeleteFor example I don't and never have shaved my legs. My first time being a bridesmaid, I was really torn about whether I should cave -give in to the pressure to be "perfect" for the wedding (though I knew good and well that my friend the bride would not care on lick.) And finally I thought: Eh! Too bad for those people who notice or are offended by my legs!
Or if I notice I'm the "nappy" haired one in a group of women with glossy, processed hair. I'll generally start with Yikes, and end with, Well, too bad for them!
Perhaps it's a bit of an aggressive stance, but I find it gets me past hurtles that might otherwise leave me wallowing in self-doubt. In a culture where my kind of beauty has only been seen on television (without an apron and kerchif) for two or three decades, I've developed the Too Bad approach as a stepping stone to complete acceptance of myself and how I look.
Thanks for sharing. You are a rare gem. The too bad approach really kicks ass.
DeleteI will say that, for many of the folks I've talked to about this, the judgement on one's body is largely self-created. It seems to be much LESS about what other people think and much more about what we think about ourselves. This is why the mirror deprivation can work well for some people, because the body-hating is often NOT about what others think, oddly enough.
That being said, the more I take a too bad approach in my own life the better I feel. In my brain I already know that society's norms are pretty stupid. So to translate that into my own action can be really liberating.
Preach it, Sister!
DeleteI completely agree with your assessment that these judgements are self-created, and I'd add that they get lots and lots of help from the culture at large.
Let the revolution begin.
Yes, culture and media certainly assist in those feelings.
DeleteBut I found this incredibly inspiring. http://www.change.org/petitions/seventeen-magazine-give-girls-images-of-real-girls